Yoni Egg: Diving Deeper

As we explore how to use the yoni egg, keep in mind that these are embodied practices. Let your body speak to you and show you the way. If your yoni lets you know that she does not want to receive the egg, set it aside and try another time. Conversely, if you try to pull out your egg and feel resistance, it could be a sign to leave it in a while longer.

Always keep good hygiene in mind during your yoni egg practice. Don’t sleep with your egg or leave it in for days on end. Usually a few hours will suffice. Also, be sure to clean it thoroughly after each practice. You can wash it with soap and water or soak it in a bowl of water with a drop or two of iodine.

Treat the egg as you would any other special crystal when you’re not using it. Keep it on your altar or another sacred space. Put it out under the energy of the full moon to cleanse and recharge it. Use sage for an energetic reset. Infuse it with intention before each use.

When you are ready to engage in an actual ritual, warm the yoni egg before placing it in your yoni. The best way to take the chill off is to roll it between your hands. Then place it at the opening of your yoni and gently press and release it. Let your yoni take the egg inside your body when she is ready. Never force your egg. Allow it to be a gentle intuitive practice.

Once your egg is inside, you can squeeze and release it using the muscles in your pelvis. Envision it as an energetic sponge collecting any negative vibes lurking in your womb space. Some of you might even be able to feel the egg inside your body but don’t be concerned if you can’t. Your level of sensitivity will depend on your particular anatomy. Rest assured that even if you cannot feel the yoni egg, it is doing its energetic work.

If you prefer, you can create your own yoni egg ritual by reflecting on whatever you might want to energetically cleanse. For example, you could think about each of your past lovers and imagine the yoni egg soaking up their energy. Or you can follow one of the many guided meditations available on YouTube.

My favorites are by Layla Martin, who sells a borosilicate glass yoni egg on her website that comes with a 30-minute practice video. She also teaches a six-week Crystal Pleasure Masterclass designed to help you explore all of the yogi egg’s potential benefits in your life. Or you can simply watch her free introductory videos here.

Martin points out that the yoni egg can do more than energetically cleanse your body. Some women, she says, experience more sexual energy and turn on when working with their yoni eggs. They also can learn to experience G-spot and cervical orgasms. Certainly, anything that puts you in touch with your sexuality is a step in that direction. She also has a video that explains a method for strengthening your pelvic floor through “vaginal weightlifting” using your yoni egg.

Kim Anami is another coach known for teaching about vaginal weightlifting designed to make your body more responsive during sex, among other benefits. Her videos on what she calls “vaginal kung fu” have gone viral and made her an instant celebrity. In her blog, she writes about the results she has witnessed in women using yoni eggs.

“I’ve had post-menopausal women regain their natural lubrication in weeks. I’ve had women have their first G-Spot, cervical and squirting orgasms within weeks. And I’ve had other women attract in bucketloads of cash. Because now their vagina and life force are turned on.”

You can watch Anami’s yoni egg video to learn why she believes jade eggs are not only the absolute best tool for vaginal fitness, but also help heal the yoni, reproductive organs and sexual trauma. She also explains how the jade egg can help you manifest your dreams and visions in life. And that is the topic of our next blog!

Release Technique: Yoni Egg

What kind of cultural and religious messages about sex did you receive when you were growing up? Wait until you are married to experience it? Engage in it only for procreation? It’s a wife’s duty towards her husband? To be fair, some of those messages are throwbacks that more likely were directed at our mothers or grandmothers than at us.

Nonetheless, you probably received some admonitions of your own. Did you learn that it was not a good idea to have multiple partners? That sex was dangerous and could lead to disease or an unwanted pregnancy? Or that you must move carefully through the world because sexual danger lurks everywhere? Clearly there is some truth to these warnings. Having many sexual partners can put you at risk of sexually transmitted disease or pregnancy, and the world can be a dangerous place for women so forewarned is forearmed.

But how many of you were also taught about the tremendous benefits of sex? Or the importance of cultivating a personal pleasure practice? Or the connection between sex and spirituality? If you learned any of these principles growing up, consider yourself lucky. Most of us were only steeped in the negative messages around sex often leading to negative outcomes as well.

In order to embody and experience the benefits that come with being sex positive, we need to clear out the cultural conditioning stored in our psyche. And if we did experience any of the negative outcomes we were warned to avoid, we most likely also have trauma lodged in our physical bodies that needs to be cleared. That’s why we begin this month’s practices with a release technique using the yoni egg.

You’ve noticed that each month of the Rebirth Journey, we have a crystal to ground us into the designated chakra and support us energetically in removing any blocks. While the carnelian is our crystal of choice for the second chakra, we also are bringing in a second crystal this month in the form of an egg.

A yoni egg is most often made of jade, but it also comes in rose quartz, obsidian and numerous other crystals. Rather than holding it in our hand or wearing it on our body, as we do with the other crystals, we put the egg directly in our womb space. Yes, it goes through your yoni – hence the name – and into your sacral chakra so you can engage in rituals believed to date back 5,000 years to Taoist Chinese dynasties.

Since an energetic exchange always occurs during sex, yoni eggs can be used to clear old sexual partners – both wanted and unwanted. Clearing out the energy of a particular partner can create space to receive someone new or more of the one you already love. Emotions also can get lodged in our bodies in the form of stuck energy. Any negative sexual experience can then become a roadblock to intimacy and connection unless it is cleared.

If you are single, it’s a good idea to use the yoni egg in between sexual partners. It’s a way to get a clean slate and clear out any energy that does not belong to you. If you are in a committed relationship, you can still benefit from the practice. Every long-term relationship can benefit from a fresh start and that’s what the yoni egg can provide.

Some believe there are physical benefits to using a yoni egg as well, although these claims are hotly debated in the scientific and medical community. If you Google the term yoni egg, one of the first results you are likely to see is how you can use it to strengthen your pelvic floor. Some articles tout the benefits of using it to increase the sensitivity of your pelvic area, home to the clitoris, g-spot and other pleasure points. But there are also plenty of warnings about its use.

I leave it to you to discern if and how to use the yoni egg. For those who decide to move forward, I will share specific practices in the next blog, including links to audios that can guide you through the energetic clearing process.

But before we get into the actual practices, let’s review the practicalities. For starters, where do you get a yoni egg? It can be as easy as going to Amazon. Just be sure you are buying from a reputable seller and getting the actual crystal and not a cheap substitute. A high-quality jade yoni egg can cost anywhere from $40 to $70. Don’t fall prey to sites selling them for $10 to $15.

You also can purchase your egg from well-known women’s advocates such as Layla Martin, who has taught yoni egg courses in the past, or Gwyneth Paltrow, who continues to sell jade eggs on her Goop site despite being fined by a California court for making false medical claims related to their use.

Don’t be surprised if you too are met with skepticism if you reveal that you are engaging in this practice. In a world where women have more often been sexually repressed than empowered, you will likely encounter resistance to anything that challenges the status quo. This is true of a lot of the practices in this blog. I simply encourage you to explore this practice for yourself, knowing that countless women have used a yoni egg with no ill effects.

As you shop for your egg, consider starting with the jade, the traditional crystal used through the centuries. However, those who are looking to heal after a break up or other painful process might buy a rose quartz egg instead so you can tap into its warm loving energy. Obsidian is a crystal often used for clearing out dark energies related to sexual trauma. Yoni eggs are also available in carnelian, nephrite, amethyst, jasper and more.

Once you have selected your crystal, it’s time to choose your size. Yoni eggs typically come in small, medium and large. Medium works for most women, but you might need a large if you have given birth vaginally multiple times or a small if you are petite or prefer to work your way up. Some yoni eggs are sold in sets of three so you can experiment with different sizes.

As a beginner, you will want to choose a yoni egg that has a hole drilled at the top. This will allow you to string unwaxed dental floss through the hole, giving you a string to pull when you are ready to remove it. Don’t worry, though. The egg can’t get lost inside your body as the cervix is an enclosed space. But without a string, you may have trouble getting it out. In that case, it’s best to squat and push our egg out like a baby,

Before we go on, let’s take a moment to pause and reflect. What do you think of the yoni egg so far? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.

Intro to Month Two

Chakra: Sacral located below your navel in your pelvic area

Sanskrit Word: Svadhisthana

Color: Orange

Sound: VAM (pronounced V-UH-M)

Gemstone: Carnelian

Release Technique: Yoni Egg

Creation tool: Pleasure Prayer

Mantras:  I value and openly express my creativity

Feminine archetype: Mother

This month we move from the dark, mysterious past into the juicy vibrant now. While the root chakra represents where we came from, the sacral chakra symbolizes the powerful energy that makes life possible. You were created in the sacral chakra of your mother’s body, and it was sexual energy that brought you into form. That’s how fundamental this chakra is to our existence. Nothing makes us feel more alive than sexual energy when it is pure and unencumbered by societal conditioning and past experiences. We will be learning how to harness that very same energy of creation to call in what we desire in our lives.

In the Conception blog on turn on, I quoted Napoleon Hill who wrote about the manifestation power of sexual energy back in the 1930s in his book, Think and Grow Rich. Yet most of us have never considered the power that this energy can bring into our everyday life. Sure, chances are you have experienced the pleasure of sex, and some of you might even have created a baby. But I’ll be sharing how you can use this magical energy to transform your life.

Before we get to the creation tool, though, we will explore how to clear low-vibration energy from our womb space, an area where many of us hold traumatic memories, experiences and fears. While our release technique, the yoni egg, might be new to you, it’s actually been used for thousands of years in Asia and elsewhere. This month, you will learn what it is and how to use it to absorb negative energy.

Let’s be clear that you do not need an actual womb to channel this powerful creative force into your life. The sacral chakra can glow brightly and spin freely whether you have an actual womb or not. And the good news is that it has no expiration date. Whether you are 18 or 80, you have the capacity to tap into sexual energy through your female body. The portal is your yoni and its 8000 nerve endings, twice as many as a penis. While life experiences may have caused you to shut down this pleasure center, or perhaps never tap into it at all, I will be inviting you to release any blocks from the past and awaken an energy that is your birthright.

Sadly, the sacral chakra is an area where social conditioning and experiences are likely to have their strongest influence. That’s why we cannot even begin to discover what’s possible until we clear out the significant energetic baggage that we are carrying. In fact, this may be among the most challenging months of the entire journey because it might touch the deepest recesses of your soul.

There’s also a sense of shame or taboo that can come with even thinking about this topic, much less talking about it and then acting on it. I ask you to trust me, remembering that I too had to release the shackles of my upbringing, and so much more in order to take this journey. I promise that if I can fully embrace my sacred sexuality, you can too. Yes, I said sacred, which not surprisingly is connected to the “sacral” name given to this chakra.

Let’s begin by learning more about the chakra that serves as the foundation for this month of the Rebirth Journey. The Sanskrit word for this chakra is Svadhisthana, and it speaks to the deliciousness of what you are about to experience. My favorite translation of the word comes from Cris Christensen in her book Chakra Rituals: Awakening the Wild Woman Within. Sva means self and svadha is another word for sweetness. Adhisthana represents the area where your being is established. You can think of the sacral chakra as your sweet abode.

Let’s begin by learning more about the chakra that serves as the foundation for this month of the Rebirth Journey. The Sanskrit word for this chakra is Svadhisthana, and it speaks to the deliciousness of what you are about to experience. My favorite translation of the word comes from Cris Christensen in her book Chakra Rituals: Awakening the Wild Woman Within. Sva means self and svadha is another word for sweetness. Adhisthana represents the area where your being is established. You can think of the sacral chakra as your sweet abode.

The symbol for this chakra is a six-petal orange lotus flower with a perfect circle in its center. Inside the top of the circle is a crescent moon. As we will explore more deeply later, the moon represents the very embodiment of the feminine essence so it’s no wonder this is the symbol associated with our womb space. Below the crescent moon, is a Sanskrit symbol that represents the sound associated with this chakra – VAM.

Just as with the other chakras, you can begin activating your sacral chakra by meditating while gazing at this symbol and repeating the sound associated with it. VAM. Supercharge the energy by holding a carnelian gemstone in your hand or wearing the color orange. We will discover other ways to activate this chakra in the blog posts that follow.

What kind of relationship do you have with your sacral chakra and sacred sexuality? Share your experiences in the comments below.

Feminine Archetype for Month One: The Maiden

In an earlier blog post, we touched on Jung’s concept of the collective unconscious or the idea that we are not born with a blank state. Rather, we are unconsciously hardwired with memories of the experiences of our ancestors and others who came before us. Jung describes this phenomenon using the archetype framework.

Archetypes are mental images or representatives of the unconscious memories that exist within all of us. A blueprint of sorts. The body has DNA, which is passed down from one generation to the next, and your soul has archetypes that reveal the impulses you have deep inside. You can look no further than the familiar themes in myths or fairy tales for examples.

Disney portrays the archetype of the helpless women or damsel in distress through characters such as Snow White, Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty. She might be asleep, waiting for a kiss from her handsome prince to awaken her, or locked in a tower, hoping to be rescued by her hero.  These same themes are repeated in modern-day movies where the ingenue is waiting for a man to save her.

Like some of the Disney characters we read about or watch in movies, we too may be metaphysically asleep or helpless in our own lives and unaware that there is another path. So, a key part of the Rebirth Journey is to wake up and be aware of what else is possible. We will do this by exploring a different feminine archetype each month.

While we are beginning with the well-known Maiden Archetype that often pervades myths and fairytales, we will not stop there. We also will be exploring the Mother, Wild Woman, Lover, Creatrix, and Priestess archetypes – each associated with a particular chakra. At the end of our journey, we will have insights into how to embody all the faces of the goddess.

For now, let’s dig deeper into the Maiden Archetype. While we may associate her with someone young and innocent, she is not necessarily a reflection of our age. Some women stay in maiden energy their entire lives. They are dependent on their father and later their husbands to take care of them. They may fall into a pattern of trying to be a “good girl” or cling to destructive relationships for fear they can’t go it alone. In her book Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential, Caroline Myss describes the shadow aspects of The Maiden this way:

“The shadow side of this archetype mistakenly teaches old patriarchal views that women are weak and teaches them to be helpless and in need of protection. It leads a woman to expect to have someone else who will fight her battles for her while she remains devoted and physically attractive and concealed in a castle.”

While I am not suggesting that we reject our male heroes or their assistance, we can stay in a receptive mode without becoming a damsel in distress. We also can break out of the good girl persona and embrace our untamed side as we will do in Month Three when we explore the Wild Woman archetype.

For now, though, I encourage you to begin by exploring the lighter side of the Maiden Archetype. Tap into her innocent childlike nature that thrives on creativity, fun, adventure and play. While she may be more contained than the Wild Woman, she is liberated in her own way. View the world through her fresh eyes and do your best to break patterns associated with the shadow side.

Let’s wrap up Month One by looking at both the shadow and the light of this archetype so we can be open to every face of the goddess:

Shadow: Co-dependent, obedient, perfectionist, people-pleaser, impressionable, powerless, puritanical

Light: Childlike, innocent, creative, enthusiastic, carefree, trusting, curious, playful, optimistic, open, spontaneous, joyful

Which parts of the Maiden Archetype are you embodying? Share your experiences in the comments below.

Create an Ancestral Altar

In his book, The Four Insights: Wisdom, Power and Grace of the Peacekeepers, Alberto Villoldo highlights some of the ideas we have been discussing in our most recent blog posts. He stresses the importance of honoring our ancestors in order to heal our family lineage and break destructive patterns.

“If you want to get rid of your historical baggage, it’s important to honor your ancestors; if you don’t, they’ll continue living through you and haunting every endeavor and relationship in your life. But if you respect and celebrate them, no matter how awful their legacy, you can move on … and so can they. You change your ancestral story and break the curse for them, your children, and your children’s children.“

Villoldo shares the story of how his family karma repeated itself through his male lineage until he recognized what was happening and took steps to change his ancestral story. His grandfather was 49 when he lost all of his money during the Great Depression. At about the same age, his father fled the Communist Revolution in Cuba with little more than the clothes on his back. His brother died at the age of 49, and Villoldo himself lost his wife and children at about the same age when they went to live in a different state.

Fortunately, the karmic patterns ended when Villoldo learned that the way out of the destructive cycles was to honor his ancestors and thank them for their gifts, even the painful ones. He feels certain that his own son will not suffer the same fate as those who came before.

According to countless ancient traditions, Villoldo has it right. We can only be free of our family karma by honoring our ancestors and even creating an altar in our home for them. If we don’t, they may be running rampant through our homes, unbeknownst to us. Villoldo puts it this way.

“If you don’t honor the ancestors with an altar you build for them, they will run amok in your house. That is, it’s better to know where they are than to ignore their legacy, kick them into the psychological gutter, and cling to the story of being a victim of their actions.“

If you feel inspired to create an ancestral altar in your home, all you need is a small area, preferably in an out-of-the way spot. The idea is to keep their energy contained and set boundaries between their lives and yours. Ideally you should be able to close the door behind you when you are not working with them.

The specifics of the altar are up to you. You could place a ceremonial cloth in the space you’ve designated. It can be white or even red to symbolize the healing of your root chakra. You can display pictures of your ancestors on the altar, if you have them. And if not, you can put the personal items that they owned there. Choose ancestors whom you feel can guide you or those that you need to connect with to heal family trauma.

If the memory of a particular ancestor causes pain, consider using photos when they were children. That may help you remember that they too were once innocent and untouched by the world. As you visit the altar each day, remember that you are choosing to do things differently, and take time to thank them for their gifts and the lessons that their lives offer.

Some people decorate their altars with flowers or other offerings from nature, such as shells or rocks. Candles can help cultivate light energy and a glass of water can invite spiritual energy. Food offerings are sometimes placed there as well in order to attract their presence.

But be prepared for the unexpected, at least at the beginning. Johanna, who was part of the first Rebirth Journey, describes her experience this way.

“I was so excited to speak to my ancestors and see what they had to say, but then I became overwhelming sick and this lasted for a few weeks. I didn’t appreciate at the beginning that it was coming from the ancestral work that I was doing. I was losing my voice and having all kinds of digestive issues to the point where I was bed-ridden for a week.“

As part of her healing, Johanna saw an acupuncturist who intuitively helped her understand what was happening. He revealed that it wasn’t malevolent energy. On the contrary, her ancestors were so excited to speak to her that they were coming all at once.

“I realized this was all coming from the work I had been doing. I let them know I was overwhelmed and needed to create my own boundaries and reach out one on one. It has been an incredible experience, and now I feel more balanced again. I feel more at ease and am approaching it in a different way. It’s all coming from a good place.“

Luisah Teish, author of Jambalaya: The Natural Woman’s Book of Personal Charms and Practical Rituals, says you don’t know how much your ancestors are willing to help you until you invite them to contact you. “The ancestors function as guides, warriors and healers. The guides are our travel consultants on the road of life. They help us to make major decisions, advise us on what to do when and with whom.”

Do you have an ancestral altar or would you consider creating one? Share your personal experiences in the comments below.

Ancestral Support: Diving Deeper

Now let’s dive a little deeper into the reasons why reconnecting with our ancestors is such an essential part of the Rebirth Journey. Whether you are aware of it or not, the remembrance of your ancestral lineage lives on in your body. Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist who introduced us to the concept of archetypes, dubs this phenomenon the collective unconscious.

Jung theorized that we come into this world with memories of our ancestors’ experiences engrained in our DNA. While you might not consciously remember what came before, your body has stored those memories in the unconscious memory where it can influence your behavior.

Scientists have verified this phenomenon with controlled studies published in academic journals such as Nature Neuroscience. What’s more, this process is not unique to humans as even animal studies have illustrated the presence of shared memories passed down through the generations.

For example, when rats are put in a maze that their parents once learned to navigate, they perform better than a control group with no exposure to the maze. If rats can have an unconscious memory of their parents’ experiences, imagine how powerful that influence is in our human experience.

Sometimes that influence can be negative. Anxiety, for example, is believed to have a genetic component that is stored in our DNA. But the collective unconscious can also have an enormously positive influence if we consciously tap into the wisdom, spiritual gifts and insights that our ancestors acquired during their lifetimes.

Tori Feldman of Sacred Ancestry posits that the remembrance of thousands of midwives, healers, and priestesses in our ancestral lineage lives on in our bodies. That’s because our lineage reaches back long before the feminine arts were repressed by patriarchal structures. And whereas our ancestors once faced persecution for practicing their spiritual gifts, we are free to engage in what in times past might have been labeled witchcraft.

But first we have to overcome the fear that no doubt also lives on in our DNA. Feldman says:

“Many women are afraid of being seen because of the witch wound that lives on in their bodies. It dates back to the time when it wasn’t safe to be seen or share our voices or spiritual gifts because it could literally mean death. They feared her mystery, her dance, her wildness. They feared how she owned her pleasure and creative power. They feared how she knew the ways of the woods and how to heal. They feared her intuitive knowledge, and how in tune she was with her body and the cycles of the earth.“

In fact, in ancient European languages, the word witch actually meant knower, seer, wand bearer, sorceress, healer and wise woman. No matter what the language, “the oldest words for witch emphasized the power of prophecy, divination and incantation, of healing, herbal knowledge, shapeshifting and shamanic flight,” says Max Dashu, author Witches and Pagans: Women in European Folk Religion, 700-1100. “Others described them in language relating to wisdom, fate and the mysteries.”

Our decision to return to that ancient path can literally help heal a planet that has become overpowered by the masculine. While it has brought immeasurable progress, it has come at a great cost that needs no explanation. Just as importantly, our collective unconscious has the power to heal our personal and collective wounds and those of our ancestors who came before. When we heal, it brings healing to our lineage backwards and forwards.

You have the power to speak for those who once had to stay silent. You can tap into the magic of your innate intuition, paving the way for a better future for those who come after you. And that long line of women who came before stands ready to cheer you on. Let’s tap into that ancestral support together, shall we?

Manifestation Practice: Ancestral Support

In the last post, we reflected on destructive intergenerational patterns and the healing that can occur through family constellations. Now we move away from the release technique for this month and focus instead on our manifestation practice for Month One of the Rebirth Journey: Ancestral Support.

Let’s think for a moment of how many ancestors came before you. Two parents, four grandparents, eight great-grandparents, 16 great-grandparents. It doesn’t take long to see how the numbers multiply exponentially as you keep going back through the generations.

Cultures all over the world honor their ancestors. The Day of the Dead, or El Dia de Los Muertos in Spanish, is among the best known of these traditions. In Mexico and other Latin cultures, people visit the graves of family members who have passed, bringing candy, food, flowers and other gifts to honor them. Known as All Souls Day, it is celebrated to a lesser extent in the United States.

Asian cultures have festive ancestral traditions as well. A Hindu tradition known as Pitru Paksha, or Fortnight of the Ancestors, also involves celebrating those who have passed with food offerings. Rituals and ceremonies span 15 days and are designed to help ancestors find peace.

In China, the Hungry Ghost Festival is believed to be a time when spirits return and wander the earth. During this month-long celebration, Chinese families set an extra spot at the table for their ancestors. When the commemoration reaches its end, they light lanterns shaped like flowers and place them in lakes, rivers or other waterways to lead the spirits back from whence they came.

While some of these commemorations are clearly aimed at helping our dearly departed reach their divine destinations, other traditions are more focused on celebrating the lives of those who came before and invoking their assistance in the here and now.

During the Chinese festival known as Quingming, or Tomb-Sweeping Day, families go to the graveyard and clean the tombs of their ancestors. They also bring along food and joss paper, which is burned as a symbol of honor. Koreans have a similar festival known as Chuseok. In addition to cleaning the graves, they use this time to thank ancestors for a good harvest.

In Japan, the Bon Festival is a Buddhist-Confucian tradition that spans three days. It is celebratory and includes feasts, games, dancing and fireworks. The Bon Odori is a special dance performed to welcome the spirits of the ancestors.

As part of the Rebirth Journey, we are also taking the time to honor our ancestors. Why? For starters because without them, we would not be here. But there’s also a belief that they live on and literally have our backs if we are willing to invite them into our lives and ask for help.

Being mindful of our ancestors also helps us realize how fortunate we are as women to live at this point in time. No doubt some of your female ancestors were labeled as witches for doing any one of the practices outlined in this blog – dancing, moon rituals, sex practices and the list goes on.

Those of us born before the 1980s most likely had mothers who did not enjoy the same freedom we have, not to mention our grandmothers, great-grandmothers and beyond. We are literally the first generation of women who can tap into the goddess traditions of the past and live in the feminine flow without risking persecution.

It’s also important to remember that this is not true for all women today. There are many countries in the world where women are denied access to education, jobs and basic human rights. What’s more, they are tightly controlled and told how to dress and behave. Those who dare transgress can be sent to “school,” as often happens at the hands of the so-called Morality Police in Iran. In worst case scenarios, women may be killed to preserve the family honor.

As those of us who are free to step fully into this feminine path of the Rebirth Journey, we do so on behalf of all those who cannot. And we also pay tribute to those who gave us life and are still here to support us. In the next blog post, I will be showing you how to create an ancestral altar where you can honor those who passed and also ask for their help manifesting the life of your desires.

In the meantime, share in the comments below if you have any rituals or practices for honoring those who have passed.

Family Constellations

Before we get into the specifics of family constellations, I invite you to close your eyes for a moment and reflect on your roots – specifically your family of origin. Begin by thinking about your mother and father. Have you had a difficult journey with them? Are you struggling to forgive either of them for things done or left undone? If so, then your life most likely reflects that angst. Alternatively, do you find yourself repeating family patterns, including destructive ones? This is what we will be seeking to examine and release during this first month of the Rebirth Journey.

For those of you who have had a difficult relationship with your family of origin, the processes we are about to explore may prove to be especially challenging. You might balk at the idea that you should honor your mother father or other relative, especially if they were abusive. Or you might have done your best to break away from those who raised you and certainly never taken time to reflect on those family members whom you have never even met. Yet I hope you will believe me when I tell you that you can run but you cannot hide from root chakra issues.

Even if you are physically away from the family that raised you, they live on in you, often unrecognized. It’s only when you can look within and see the unconscious role that they still may be playing in your life that you will truly be free.

Don’t worry. I will not be telling you that you must befriend your abuser (assuming you have one) or move back in with your parents. But I have come to believe that you must honor those who gave you life simply because you would not be here at all without them. So let’s delve into family constellations so you can stop repeating the patterns of those who came before you and truly start living your best and authentic life.

As I discussed in the last post, family constellations is a healing modality designed to bring resolution in the fifth dimension for family issues you are experiencing in the here and now, the third dimension. It’s mystical and mysterious, and as anyone who has utilized it can attest, incredibly powerful. Given the enigmatic quality of family constellations, the best way to explain it is by describing the actual process.

Imagine walking into a room full of strangers who have volunteered to serve as representatives of your family members. You, as the “constellator,” have a family issue in mind that you would like to resolve and, one by one, you select individuals in that room to represent your mom, dad, siblings or other family members. It does not matter if those family members are still living or dead. You also will pick someone to represent yourself.

As these representatives stand up and step onto the constellation floor, they have no idea who you are or what issue you are trying to resolve. They simply begin describing what they are feeling – including their reaction to those around them. A facilitator is there to guide the representatives towards resolution, while you sit back and observe as if you were at a play.

While it can be hard to understand or even believe, the resolution that occurs on the constellation floor often changes your life in ways that will amaze and astound you. Rancor vanishes when the family members embrace in the constellation. Words of love expressed during the process translate into real life. And so much more.

The effects may continue for weeks and months. Rifts that have been simmering for years suddenly resolve. New understanding comes of what causes your family members to behave as they do. In the process, many of the life issues that you may have been dealing with personally gradually fall away. Destructive patterns are broken and new opportunities emerge.

How is this possible? The family constellation process is believed to tap into the morphic field, a concept coined by Dr. Rupert Sheldrake to describe a kind of “knowing field.” Without actually knowing you or any member of your family, a room full of strangers can access information only known to the family members themselves when they are in this field.

The morphic field is like other fields that we cannot see, but nonetheless have an effect on our lives. Think of the gravitational field for example. Although we feel its effects as we move through the world, we do not have to understand gravity itself in order to experience it. The electromagnetic field is another case in point. We can’t see it, but we tap into it every day when we pick up our cell phones and access wifi networks. The morphic field is the same. We do not have to understand it intellectually in order to benefit from it.

Here’s how the founder of family constellations, Bert Hellinger, describes what takes place in the morphic field:

During a constellation of the family, the client randomly chooses participants as stand-ins (representatives) for himself or other members of the family. Typically this might be the mother, father, brother(s) and sister(s). He then places them in a centered and connected way, in a spatial arrangement in relation to each other. Suddenly something comes to light in this process that surprises him. That is to say that in the process of the constellation, he comes in contact with a knowing that was not accessible before.” *

There is another intimately connected concept known as entanglement that is part of the constellation process. In quantum physics, entanglements are small atomic particles that cluster together until they are looked at by an observer. Once observed, they disentangle. Unhealthy family entanglements and patterns also disentangle when observed in this morphic field.

Perhaps you are wondering where to begin in healing your own family relationships. First look for patterns. Unresolved trauma in the past has a way of showing up again and again until someone is brave enough to see it and heal it. Or to put it another way, that which is unresolved will be passed on to the next generation until it is healed.

Have you noticed that in your own family? Do you come from a line of addicts, divorcees, widows or…fill in your own blank? Or maybe you’ve been told that you are just like your grandmother or you notice that your son is just like his uncle. While patterns may skip a generation, that does not necessarily mean that they have stopped. Regardless of how patterns show up in your life, family constellations can help put you on a different and more loving path.

Look too at current romantic relationships. Are you trying to change your partner? According to family constellation theory, the solution lies not in our partner but in our ancestors. While you can’t change what happened in the past, you can change your perception of it and that’s what makes all the difference. When we can fully love our parents, love will flow more freely with our romantic partners.

You’ve no doubt heard of the Mother Wound, for example, and many of us have struggled with that in our lives. According to Hellinger: “The way you see your mother will be the way you see your life.” Even if you consciously love your mother, look at the subconscious beliefs to find a deeper truth. Some of you may resonate more with the concept of the Father Wound. Constellation theory posits that unresolved issues with our fathers will often show up in our careers or how we move about the world because it is our father who gives us the impulse to open our wings and fly.

No matter what has happened in your parents’ past, remember that you do not know the whole story. If you had walked in their shoes, you might be just like them. Rather than judging them for their inadequacies, we remain in gratitude for the gift of life and watch our lives change as a result.

If you can get the opportunity to simply observe a constellation, I encourage you to do so. You will see again and again that representatives tap into a knowing of the family member that they are representing. They might even feel the physical symptoms of that person. When you decide to actually constellate, you will no doubt be amazed by the magic of the process. As you sit back and observe, long-standing family dysfunction can get resolved before your very eyes, paving the way for your rebirth.

*Hellinger, B., Ordnungen der Liebe, Ein Kursbuch, Carl-Aver-Systeme, Verkig, Heidelberg, 2001.

Intro to Month One

Chakra: Root located at the base of the spine

Sanskrit Word: Muladhara

Color: Red

Sound: Lam (L-UH-M)

Gemstone: Red jasper or ruby

Release Technique: Family Constellations

Creation Tool: Ancestral Altar

Mantras: I am grounded. I am safe. I am secure.

Feminine archetype: The Maiden

Just as the roots of a plant serve as the foundation that nurtures the stem and the leaves and allows it to grow, so too does our root chakra serve as the groundwork for our Rebirth Journey.  In order to truly bloom into our new life, it’s important to examine where we have come from and honor the journey that has taken us thus far.

As you will learn in the blog posts ahead, we often repeat family patterns unknowingly and subconsciously until we recognize what we are doing and decide to make a change. Torie Feldman of Sacred Ancestry puts it this way, “When they say, ‘It runs in the family,’ you say, ‘And this is where it runs out.’” That’s why we will begin our journey by examining family patterns that we want to break, while also tapping into the tremendous support that is available from our ancestors, living or not.

The process we will be using to release unhealthy family patterns is a healing modality known as family constellations. Created by a former Jesuit priest named Bert Hellinger, this process facilitates changes in the fifth dimension that are often not accessible in the third dimension where we live out our daily lives. While family constellations can take different forms, I will be explaining one of the most common approaches in the next blog post.

It’s possible that family constellations are not available to you at the moment, but I truly believe that when the student is ready, the teacher appears. If what you learn in this journey intrigues you, then some way, somehow, you are likely to find a facilitator who can help you tap into the immense power of this process.

Once we have covered the release technique for this month, we will go over the creative process that we will be using to bring in what we desire. This process will involve tapping into ancestral support, which is readily available to everyone at any time. Whether you realize it or not, all of those who came before you stand ready to assist you in another dimension. But as with everything in our life, we have to be aware that the support is there in order to access it.

Our root chakra, located at the base of the spine is where we will begin energetically. As you can see in the chart above, each chakra is represented by a Sanskrit word, a symbol known as a yantra, a color and a sound. Let’s dive deeper into each of these properties to more fully understand the root chakra.

Let’s start by looking at the meaning of the Sanskrit word for the root chakra: muladhara. The first part of the word, mula, means root or beginnings. The second part of the word, dhara, means foundation. This is the chakra that supports your life force and so we begin there.

The yantra, or ancient geometrical symbol for the root chakra, is a red lotus flower with four petals that represent both the four directions (east, west, north and south) and the four elements (earth, fire, air and water). Inside the lotus flower, you will see a square embedded with deep symbolic meaning. Take a closer look and you will see an upside-down triangle, symbolizing shakti feminine energy. Inside the triangle is a symbol for the masculine energy, shiva, and kundalini energy, which has the power to rise up through the body and open each of the other chakras.

You can connect with the energy of the root chakra by gazing at the symbol while breathing deeply in meditation. You also might try closing your eyes and visualizing the color red while chanting the LAM sound a few times.  As you travel through this part of the journey, I encourage you to wear red often, especially when you are carrying out the processes I will be describing.  Also consider getting a red jasper crystal or a ruby gemstone. Both of these elements associated with the root chakra will help you release any blocks that may be preventing the chakra from spinning freely and emitting its most vibrant color.

Recall that the lower chakras energetically support those that are above it. We begin at the root so we can ensure that it will energetically fuel those chakras we will be examining in the months ahead. The chakra system is intuitive. No one has actually been able to see the chakras nor tangibly measure their velocity. But you will often know that healing has occurred by the way you feel physically.

I can use myself as an example. For some time now, I have been feeling pain right at the base of the spine where the root chakra is located. Because the chakra is associated with the maiden archetype, I knew that I needed to look to my family patterns for clues to the origin of that pain. My own journey has taken me through several family constellations, and along the way, it has become clear that I cannot be healthy in my body, mind or spirit unless I address this foundational element of my being.

While our families of origin can be the source of our pain – both physical and emotional – they also can be the source of our healing. No matter what spiritual tradition you follow, you are likely to find a teaching on eternal life woven into it. A nearly universal belief is that our physical bodies die, but our spiritual selves live on in another dimension through our souls. This month you will learn why so many wisdom teachers have spoken about the support of the ancestors, and you will also learn how to create an ancestral altar.

If you are interested in learning even more about the chakra system, I recommend the book, Chakra Rituals: Awakening the Wild Woman Within by Cristi Christensen. She has created a seven-week program with step-by-step instructions on activating each chakra through yoga poses, mudras, writing prompts and more. These rituals can serve as a companion that will allow you to go even deeper into the chakras that guide the Rebirth Journey.

We will end our discussion of the root chakra with Christensen’s Grounding Cord Meditation, which she describes as “an active visualization that will give you the necessary stability and support to root down, release and rise up.” It is a great way to kick off Month One and the principles of releasing what does serve not us while calling in what is in our highest good.

Grounding Cord Meditation

Bring your attention to your root chakra at the base of the pelvis.

Visualize the trunk of your favorite tree growing down from the base of your spine.

Breathe deeply in and out as you feel yourself held and grounded into the support of the Earth.

With each exhalation release what no longer serves you. Send it down the tree trunk and into the Earth.

With each inhalation, imagine drinking in the exact nourishment your body needs today.

Sit with this visualization for 5 to 10 slow deep breaths, feeling yourself embraced and supported by the Earth.

Our Framework: The Chakra System

Before embarking on our Rebirth Journey, let’s go over the framework that will be guiding our path over the next nine months. I explained in an earlier post that we will be using the chakras system as a roadmap of sorts. But what exactly is a chakra? The word chakra is derived from the Sanskrit word for wheel or disk. It refers to spinning vortexes of energy that correspond to certain parts of our body. There is written evidence of the chakra system dating back to between 500 and 1500 BC in the Veda yoga texts, but many scholars believe this wisdom was passed on orally long before that.

According to the Vedic teachings, our chakras must be open and balanced in order to experience physical, emotional and spiritual wellbeing. If they are blocked, we may experience symptoms related to that part of our body. Even though you cannot see your chakras, you can sense them through your intuition. But that’s easier to do once you are familiar with each chakra and its qualities. For example, each chakra is associated with a color, sound, and an asana or yoga pose that you can use to gain greater awareness and get unstuck.

While emphasis is often placed on the chakras’ role in our emotional and spiritual well-being, recent research supports the belief that these energy centers are also connected with our physical health related to the organs, joints and tissues near that area of the body. For example, a blocked throat chakra might manifest as frequent sore throats or thyroid issues. Stomach aches and digestion issues could be directly related to a blocked solar plexus chakra. And clogged arteries and other cardiovascular problems could literally be associated with a blocked heart chakra.

It’s possible too for blocked chakras to manifest as a general feeling of malaise. You might have trouble sleeping or experience frequent anxiety. Moodiness can be another indication that the energy is not flowing freely through your body. These types of symptoms might be more difficult to associate with a particular chakra, but they might nonetheless be a sign that energy is not flowing freely through your body.

In some cases, an overactive chakra may lead to an exaggeration of the qualities associated with that part of your body. Talking too much, for example, or even hyperthyroidism could be signs of an overactive throat chakra. If your solar plexus chakra is out of balance or spinning too fast, it could manifest as controlling behavior or micromanaging. In other words, each overactive chakra would result in its own set of symptoms. So, while we do not want our chakras to be blocked, we don’t want them to be wildly out of sync either.

Because the chakras are interrelated, if one is out of balance, it can make you feel off center in other parts of your life. For example, the root chakra located at the base of the spine provides prana or life force energy to the sacral chakra in your pelvic area. If that channel is blocked, you may feel emotionally or physically off balance. The vitality of the lower chakras is essential for the health of the upper chakras.

Most people focus only on the seven main chakras that run from the base of the spine to the crown of the head, but there are some traditions that believe we may have as more than 1000 energy centers. In our nine-month journey, we will focus on nine chakras – the seven that are most familiar and associated with our physical bodies plus two more chakras that are connected with our spirit and soul.

As we focus on each chakra over the next nine months, you will learn practices that will help you release and transmute the emotions, feelings, memories and experiences that might be blocking that particular chakra. And as we clear out what is blocking us, we will create more room to bring in what we want to receive.

Our journey begins with the three lower chakras, associated with earthly matters: the root chakra, associated with survival; the sacral chakra, associated with sex, and the solar plexus chakra, connected to your power. We then will shift our focus to the top five chakras related to our higher consciousness. There’s the throat chakra that allows you to use your voice to speak truth; the third eye chakra, which taps into your intuition; and the crown chakra that connects you with the divine and your life purpose.

The eighth chakra in our system hovers above the head like a halo and is unaffected by the death of the physical body. It represents our connection with angels and guides. The ninth charka extends through the cosmos and is associated with our soul purpose. The heart chakra creates a bridge between the higher and lower consciousness and connect the upper and lower chakras with love and compassion.

As life force energy, or prana, flows up through the spinal channels known as nadis, it also traverses the left and right side of our bodies, connecting our masculine and feminine essence. In yogic philosophy, the two sides are seen as complementary, with male energy known as shiva and female energy known as shakti. Free flowing energy helps create balance between the two.

Throughout the journey ahead, you will be learning about the color and sound associated with each chakra as well as the Sanskrit word and symbol that describe it. These are all tools that you can use to connect with the energy of the chakra and imagine it becoming unblocked and spinning freely as it is restored to balance. See it changing from a dull grey to its original vibrant color, and at the end of the nine months, you will have a beautiful rainbow of energy and vitality that will allow you to thrive mind, body and soul.