If it’s been awhile since you’ve connected to your sexual energy and turn on, a pleasure prayer may feel beyond your reach. But there are plenty of ways to warm up to the idea, beginning with simple changes to your daily practices. Since the mind is our most powerful sexual organ, even thinking about these practices can make a difference. If you choose to shore up those thoughts with action, momentum will ensue and you will find yourself changing before your very eyes.
One of the simplest actions you can take to connect with your turn on is going through your panty drawer. Imagine showing off your current selection to your partner or best friend. What does it reveal about you? Take the time to sort through your underwear before you answer that question, tossing out the stretched out, faded, or outright torn ones. Consider replacing them with something more feminine and beautiful. If your budget won’t allow that at the moment, you might be able to achieve the same feeling by simply browsing sites like Natori, Intimissimi and Hanky Panky and letting your imagination go wild. My teacher, Mama Gena, advocates Panty Free Friday, and you could even opt for that instead or adopt it as a daily practice if it works for you.
Now move on to your sleepwear. From looking at department store offerings, I know that women must like comfy PJs, but how sexy do they make you feel? Can you find something in your current wardrobe that makes you feel beautiful, or better yet, can you start sleeping naked? (Bonus points if you have soft silky sheets that make you feel luxurious). If so, I guarantee you that you’re one step closer to accessing your turn on and sex magic.
Now consider how you bathe your body. Do you take a quick shower in the morning, moving on as quickly as you can? Or could you take some time to savor luxurious bath body products that make you feel like a queen? I can hear the protests now. “I have kids, a job, a husband”….fill in the blank. But if you consider how much time we all spend browsing social media or watching TV, I know you’ll agree that you can probably find the time to turn this every day practice into a ritual. Savor the feeling of the water on your skin. Breathe in the aroma of your shampoo or body wash. Take time to really notice the body oil or lotion that you use to caress your body.
If you have a tub, a bath is even better. Light some candles, luxuriate in the aromatherapy and bubbles, and play soft sensual music. My own bathtub sat unused for years until I discovered this new way of living. Now baths are one of my favorite ways of connecting with my turn on.
Even your food can be sensual if you take time to truly savor the flavors and feel the texture. When you can, take time to sit down to a beautiful table, complete with fine china and crystals. Be present, pausing to enjoy each bite. Try sounding out your pleasure with some mmmms and aaaaahs. Sound can be a way of connecting with your vagus nerve and pleasure points in your body.
While these simple practices may feel good, they still might not be enough to get you in the orgasmic energy that will allow you to co-create with the divine through a pleasure prayer. That’s why I also recommend a vibrator. Perhaps you already have one, but I’d be lying if I told you that I had invested in one before I embarked on this feminine path.
I still remember when a dear friend gifted me my first vibrator and I was blown away, wondering if my husband and kids would be able to hear it (they can’t — as long as you practice a little discretion). While my first vibrator was very basic, they come in every shape and size and at many different price points. My personal favorite is still the old-fashioned bullet that I received back in the day, but you can find just about anything you desire, including the powerful Hitachi Magic Wand, which seems apropos given that a pleasure prayer is also known as sex magic.
By now you see where I’m going with this. Start small. Try just one of these practices. Then look for every opportunity throughout your day to connect with your sensuality, from how you sleep to how you bathe to the clothes you put on your body. Trust me when I tell you that, in time, a pleasure prayer will feel like the most natural thing in the world, and the results will astound you.
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