What kind of cultural and religious messages about sex did you receive when you were growing up? Wait until you are married to experience it? Engage in it only for procreation? It’s a wife’s duty towards her husband? To be fair, some of those messages are throwbacks that more likely were directed at our mothers or grandmothers than at us.
Nonetheless, you probably received some admonitions of your own. Did you learn that it was not a good idea to have multiple partners? That sex was dangerous and could lead to disease or an unwanted pregnancy? Or that you must move carefully through the world because sexual danger lurks everywhere? Clearly there is some truth to these warnings. Having many sexual partners can put you at risk of sexually transmitted disease or pregnancy, and the world can be a dangerous place for women so forewarned is forearmed.
But how many of you were also taught about the tremendous benefits of sex? Or the importance of cultivating a personal pleasure practice? Or the connection between sex and spirituality? If you learned any of these principles growing up, consider yourself lucky. Most of us were only steeped in the negative messages around sex often leading to negative outcomes as well.
In order to embody and experience the benefits that come with being sex positive, we need to clear out the cultural conditioning stored in our psyche. And if we did experience any of the negative outcomes we were warned to avoid, we most likely also have trauma lodged in our physical bodies that needs to be cleared. That’s why we begin this month’s practices with a release technique using the yoni egg.
You’ve noticed that each month of the Rebirth Journey, we have a crystal to ground us into the designated chakra and support us energetically in removing any blocks. While the carnelian is our crystal of choice for the second chakra, we also are bringing in a second crystal this month in the form of an egg.
A yoni egg is most often made of jade, but it also comes in rose quartz, obsidian and numerous other crystals. Rather than holding it in our hand or wearing it on our body, as we do with the other crystals, we put the egg directly in our womb space. Yes, it goes through your yoni – hence the name – and into your sacral chakra so you can engage in rituals believed to date back 5,000 years to Taoist Chinese dynasties.
Since an energetic exchange always occurs during sex, yoni eggs can be used to clear old sexual partners – both wanted and unwanted. Clearing out the energy of a particular partner can create space to receive someone new or more of the one you already love. Emotions also can get lodged in our bodies in the form of stuck energy. Any negative sexual experience can then become a roadblock to intimacy and connection unless it is cleared.
If you are single, it’s a good idea to use the yoni egg in between sexual partners. It’s a way to get a clean slate and clear out any energy that does not belong to you. If you are in a committed relationship, you can still benefit from the practice. Every long-term relationship can benefit from a fresh start and that’s what the yoni egg can provide.
Some believe there are physical benefits to using a yoni egg as well, although these claims are hotly debated in the scientific and medical community. If you Google the term yoni egg, one of the first results you are likely to see is how you can use it to strengthen your pelvic floor. Some articles tout the benefits of using it to increase the sensitivity of your pelvic area, home to the clitoris, g-spot and other pleasure points. But there are also plenty of warnings about its use.
I leave it to you to discern if and how to use the yoni egg. For those who decide to move forward, I will share specific practices in the next blog, including links to audios that can guide you through the energetic clearing process.
But before we get into the actual practices, let’s review the practicalities. For starters, where do you get a yoni egg? It can be as easy as going to Amazon. Just be sure you are buying from a reputable seller and getting the actual crystal and not a cheap substitute. A high-quality jade yoni egg can cost anywhere from $40 to $70. Don’t fall prey to sites selling them for $10 to $15.
You also can purchase your egg from well-known women’s advocates such as Layla Martin, who has taught yoni egg courses in the past, or Gwyneth Paltrow, who continues to sell jade eggs on her Goop site despite being fined by a California court for making false medical claims related to their use.
Don’t be surprised if you too are met with skepticism if you reveal that you are engaging in this practice. In a world where women have more often been sexually repressed than empowered, you will likely encounter resistance to anything that challenges the status quo. This is true of a lot of the practices in this blog. I simply encourage you to explore this practice for yourself, knowing that countless women have used a yoni egg with no ill effects.
As you shop for your egg, consider starting with the jade, the traditional crystal used through the centuries. However, those who are looking to heal after a break up or other painful process might buy a rose quartz egg instead so you can tap into its warm loving energy. Obsidian is a crystal often used for clearing out dark energies related to sexual trauma. Yoni eggs are also available in carnelian, nephrite, amethyst, jasper and more.
Once you have selected your crystal, it’s time to choose your size. Yoni eggs typically come in small, medium and large. Medium works for most women, but you might need a large if you have given birth vaginally multiple times or a small if you are petite or prefer to work your way up. Some yoni eggs are sold in sets of three so you can experiment with different sizes.
As a beginner, you will want to choose a yoni egg that has a hole drilled at the top. This will allow you to string unwaxed dental floss through the hole, giving you a string to pull when you are ready to remove it. Don’t worry, though. The egg can’t get lost inside your body as the cervix is an enclosed space. But without a string, you may have trouble getting it out. In that case, it’s best to squat and push our egg out like a baby,
Before we go on, let’s take a moment to pause and reflect. What do you think of the yoni egg so far? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.
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